Tag Archives: meat

Making a Sandwich

To some, a sandwich is a quick and easy lunch. Put something between two slices of bread and bam, you’re ready to go.

Those people should never be trusted, either inside the kitchen or out.

The Sandwich is something that can rise above and beyond its ingredients. In no situation is the term “the whole is greater than the sum of its parts” more applicable. To make a Sandwich right, you have to work at it. It takes preparation. Time. And the willingness to get your hands dirty.

There is no “perfect sandwich”. A vegetarian would not be happy with one of my…creations. But there are ideal sandwiches for each individual. I made such a  sandwich today.

Since I ate my sandwich too quickly for it to be photographed, let me paint you a picture….with words.

First layer, bread. Then yellow mustard and a mild cheddar, sliced thin. Next, a layer of bacon, with some more, thinly sliced cheese. Then some roast beef and turkey. Another layer of cheese. Next, add a second layer of bacon. More cheese and mustard. Bread slice.

The final step involved frying the whole kit and kaboodle in bacon grease.

I’m not writing out this recipe so that you can make it yourself.

I’m writing it here to brag.

It was delicious.

Dylan Charles

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Recipe: Lil’ Griddlin’s

I haven’t talked about it much, but I do a fair amount of cooking. I’ve long ago conquered the egg and ramen is no longer beyond me. After all this experience, I’ve decided to share with you, my lucky readers, a recipe I made up just yesterday. I call it Lil Griddlin’s, because cutesy names hide the despair.

Ingredients:

A half pound or so of ground meat

Some cheese from the back of the fridge

Salt

Pepper

Oil

Mustard

Whoops, almost forgot the onion

Directions:

So what you want to do is chop up the onion and put it in a frying pan at about medium heat. Then have a panic attack when you smell burning onions and you realize that you forgot to put in the oil. Put in some oil, you dingus.

While that’s getting mushy and oily, mix up some salt and pepper into the meat. Throw in some cheese, because why the hell not? Cheese is good.

Make three or so irregularly shaped patties and drop them into the oil and onion mixture. Everything should now smell pretty good. Congratulate yourself. Flip the patties a couple times until you get bored.

Slash one of the patties and take a gander inside. Recoil at the sight of bright pink meat. Holy shit, these are still raw. Hack at all three patties until everything (the patties, you and the wall) is coated in hot oil. There shouldn’t be any pink left.

Take the remains of the patties and scoop them onto a plate. This does not look appetizing. Cover it with some more cheese in an attempt to cover your shame. Squirt mustard on it and enjoy your Lil Griddlins!

Best enjoyed in the dark by yourself.

Dylan Charles

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Filed under Food: Cooking It, Eating It and Drinking It